We're childfree and happy. You could be too!
If you’re easily offended please do NOT watch comedian Doug Stanhope as he leaps from global warming to overpopulation to sodomy to minivans to abortion.
If you bristle when you hear four letter words uttered by a foolishly dressed man swilling beer, this video is not for you. You will be offended. Avoid the hurt, and skip this post. There are others…
But if you’d like to hear Doug Stanhope on overpopulation, if you suspect that abortion is green then you’re in for a wild ride. Enjoy!
I’m returning to familiar territory this morning for no good reason except that I couldn’t resist the temptation to pass along this video of Noni Hazlehurst reading Go the Fuck to Sleep. We’ve featured Adam Mansbach’s Go the F**k to Sleep before. Amy asked, “Is this the beginning of a new trend in ‘kidding around’ lit for parents?” And more recently we chuckled along with Brian while a granny read Go the F**k to Sleep to her less-than-interested grandchild.
Sure, the book’s germane for WNKy DINKs as Mansbach spelled out pretty clearly:
“Despite the tremendous culture of parenting there’s a lot that doesn’t get talked about. Hopefully, the honesty of this book will open up the conversation. These are legitimate ways that we feel, and we should laugh about it, and be honest about these tribulations.” (Today Show)
Opening up the conversation about the breeding/childfree choice is ground zero for Why No Kids? There are plenty of “breeder bashers” and vehement childfree voices calling for change, and though our individual perspectives may sometimes overlap, this blog is an attempt to move beyond entrenched disagreement. This blog is an attempt to provoke, encourage, nurture and support conversation. Dialogue. Debate. The authors do not speak with a unified voice or vision about our childfree choices, nor do we expect that from our readers. But we do hope to catalyze the sort of constructive and healthy consideration that underpins smart choices.
Humor (I’m showing my cards here) is an effective icebreaker. Though Go the F**k to Sleep
“I totally related to it,” she said. “My first child didn’t sleep until he was two, and the first time he did sleep through I thought he’d died.”
The book, and her reading of it, is a bit of fun, she says, “but there’s a serious underlying issue. People need to understand when they’re talking about how nice it would be to have a baby that it’s a huge undertaking.” (The Age)
I hope you laughed. I hope you thought. Don’t stop!
For those of you that saw our previous FB post of childfree Chelsea Handler and asked for more, we borrowed this one from Alvaro and our friends on “Happily Childfree“.
Ms. Handler is one of the few female comics (that I know of) with the balls to twist her own taboo baby bashing into thought provoking and funny. Louis C.K.’s “Kids Suck” rants are touching and funny and Aziz Ansari’s take is hilarious too, but the first is a parent and neither would seem to risk the wrath of mommies like a female comic does when she says
“I could have been a mother too okay, three times, but I made the right decisions.”
What do you think? Do you have examples of other women doing this kind of comedy?
Here’s Chelsea Handler’s interview that we posted on Facebook in May:
I’m not sure if the interview occurred before or after the Laugh Factory routine.
1) Video: Aziz Ansari Is Afraid of Babies
2) Kids Suck?: Deadpan and Deadspin Daddies are FUNNY
3) Video: Amy Poehler’s Tip For Traveling With Children
4) Video Vasectomy Shocker: A Survivor’s Tale of Survival
Grandma can’t stop reading this Ge The F**k To Sleep book. What will her infectiously funny rendition do for the Not-For-Kiddie Lit trend WNK discussed previously? Will some of those upset parents finally laugh along with Grandma and take themselves less seriously?
Related Stories:
And “Garfunkel & Oates” are cute. Who knew? They can carry a tune and smile and condescend at the same time. And while their song is topical in a way that kinda fits them on our page, I am already making apologies, starting with my friend Sarah, who is not smug at all lately. Thanks to Rochelle for posting this on Happily Childfree.
Aziz’s Friends: “Aziz! You’re not going to believe it! I just had a baby!”
Aziz: “Hahahahaha! That sucks! Oh man, you’re going to have to take care of that thing for18 years and make sure it doesn’t murder anyone! I’ll talk to you later. I’m going to go do literally anything I want.”
And if you want to keep laughing or prefer conversation staring comedy from daddies, have a look at Louis C.k. and Drew Magary on WNK here.
Image via Wikipedia
This isn’t just another vasectomy story. Ot is it? Jason Jones is seeking a cure for a “disease” that makes him exhausted, fat and dirty?
Jason Jones narrating: “The doctor held my life in his hands.”
Jason Jones: ”Would you say I have a larger than average vas deferens?”
Surgeon: “You have a great size vas deferens”
Jason Jones: “Thank you Dr. Weiner”
This one is for the football fans and any parents or childfree readers that appreciate the role comedy can play in lightening a mood or dissolving taboos.
Louis C.K. says “Kids Suck”
and Deadspin.com‘s Drew Magary suggests “It’s Okay To Love Your TV More Than Your Children”
“Let’s just get this out of the way: Of course I love the television more than my own children. That TV cost a mere $700. I spend that much on diapers every fucking year. It has a functional mute button, which means I do not have to hear it if I don’t want to. The people who appear on the TV set are far more articulate than my 1-year-old, and thus more interesting to listen to (unless the people in question are Chris Berman and Steve Young). The TV takes up less space and doesn’t leave toys and bits of cake all over the goddamn place.”
They might be kidding or just pandering, but from my seat, it is clear that they make us laugh by shining a light on things that everyone thinks (sometimes?), but few are saying. That and just plain good story telling. And even if you aren’t laughing after reading and watching, maybe you’ll agree that these daddies are helping future parents and those who may one day choose not to breed by sharing their thoughts, experiences, honesty and hyperbole. We know having kids aint easy, and what better way to give us all permission to say so than through comedy? The only question is, are these things mommies can get away with saying. (If you know of any moms that are, please share them with us.)
Childfree? Really?
Common questions and comments (Part 3)
“When are you having kids?”, they usually ask. Not “if”. And here are more of the most common responses to my answer:
6) “Who’s going to take care of you when you’re old?”
I’d like to say “me”. I’m responsible for myself. It’s my obligation to invest in my brain and my body and strive for healthy and happy. If or when I can’t, I should have saved enough money or given enough love to ask for and receive help.
Instead I say we’re open to adopting adults from the next generation of non-breeders, or blurt something else unfunny, dishonest and/or swarthy, while wondering:
How can I get an unborn heir to agree that, in exchange for me handling fatherly responsibilities, they will one day owe the same commitment to me?
How could I dare make my health another’s responsibility unless I managed my own body, diet, alcohol and nicotine consumption perfectly?
It’s already too late for that, so rather than saddling someone else with the burden of the bongwater I drank in my twenties, I hope that the economics of living child-free allow enough room for a giant TV and a smiley, shapely nurse with soft hands and a deep appreciation of the History Channel and eighties music.
Or maybe we’ll just invest in Long-term care insurance.
http://personalinsure.about.com/od/longtermcare/a/ltcguide.htm
7) “Go to doctor what’s his name. He’ll get you pregnant!”
This happens more often than you might think. People are understandably presumptuous, and sincerely charitable when your spouse is a gifted teacher and children’s book author. (Touchtheart.com)
So when we lived in New York, parents of her students were eager to offer recommendations and referrals, assuming motherhood was an obvious goal for someone so nurturing and bossy.
Ever wonder...
Doing my best Andy Rooney impersonation:
Did you ever notice how almost every book for women these days is about weddings and babies? I remember when women couldn’t even have books.
OK enough with the old man voice. I’ve been noticing a recurring theme with many of my steamy beach reads that is not so sexy – the main characters can’t decide if they should have kids or NOT! The stories are not the fun and tempting reads that the back cover teases. These fence-sitting literary couples struggle to find themselves and survive debt, betrayal and various inane obstacles only to come together and live happily ever after. Then they go and ruin things by making baby plans.
The two chick-lit novels below include the “Should we? Or shouldn’t we?” theme:
Baby Proof by Emily Giffen
Fans love her sorbet colored titles on marriage and the great void that happens next. In this story, Ben, the husband who vowed he’d live a childfree life suddenly wakes up one day and – yikes — changes his mind. Now what?
Nanny Returns by Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus
Four million readers loved The Nanny Diaries but when Nanny returned more people went meh? Not so much. Nan is back and fate has her crossing paths with her former charges, but can she handle a little cutie pie of her own? And will it tear her against-all-odds relationship apart?
A friend of mine mentioned that the childfree conundrum makes an appearance in Freedom by Jonathan Franzen. (A pre-Oprah Book Club copy is sitting on my shelf.) Franzen would likely freak out if he discovered his name on the same page as “beach read” or “chick lit” or “books for women”. Which brings me back to Andy Rooney…
Did you ever notice that people without kids have way too much time to read books?
This article, Study: Wanting Things Makes Us Happier Than Having Them, does not mention children specifically, but… should it? Is the modern desire for children, like our want for other new, shiny things, a result of relentless marketing? The most defensible, obvious answer to both of the questions above is “No”. Biology, instinct, and the […]
