May 9, 2021

Shake your Babymaker – Virtual Babies!

Okay I’ll admit it I don’t want kids, but I still have imaginary baby names in my head and I’m curious about what my baby would look like. Just not curious enough to find out for real. For the other childfree and curious there is a place for us, or rather several websites that will take pictures of you and your significant other and mix the virtual, visual DNA to create, TA-DA – a baby!

Luxland Babymaker has the tagline, What will your baby look like? And promises that it’s not like the other sites because it can see the future:

Have a lust for someone? Eager to see what your baby will look like? No need to wait nine months to see your baby’s face — BabyMaker will accurately produce a picture of your baby. Satisfy your curiosity and peek into the future!

There are even baby maker apps and celebrity baby maker sites in case you want to see what your baby would look like if Ashton Kutcher is the baby daddy. I hear he’s available!

I tried Makemebabies.comwith mixed results below:

It is very entertaining if you want to laugh some milk right out of your nose. Amazingly my baby looks just like the baby on the ad and nothing like me or my mate. Baby G even has blue eyes and blond hair which is genetically impossible! This is kind of addictive and I can totally see why the Duggar family is eagerly expecting their 20th real child. It’s fun to make babies! But I will stick to virtual kids.

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Ten Celebrities Give Their Reasons For Being Childless By Choice

Eva Mendes

Eva Mendes (Image via RottenTomatoes.com)

Here’s a good piece of celebrity eye candy coupled with some intriguing answers from some that are childfree: Ten Celebrities Give Their Reasons For Being Childless By Choice | Mommyish.

We promise to post some more celebrity and childfree intrigue soon. Some of these things are old news, but never dated, and still an interesting reads or resources maybe…

From Mommyish:

Celebrity reproduction is a huge industry. With websites devoted to Hollywood pregnancy and starlet offspring, celebs are constantly pressured to explain their choices about having children. We here at Mommyish feel pretty sympathetic towards these celebrities, because hey, awkward questions suck! Unfortunately, actresses like Jennifer Aniston and Cameron Diaz seem to be regularly harassed about the contents of their uterus and just when they’re going to procreate.

The slideshow and quotes are worth examining. Here are a few highlights:

Simon Cowell:

“At my age, definitely. The reality is, with the way I live my life, I wouldn’t have the patience. I’d sort of want people born at the age of 10, I think.”

Fergie:

“I don’ t want anything clouding my focus.”

LOS ANGELES, CA - AUGUST 30:  Actress Portia d...

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

“We thought about it. We love to be around children after they’ve been fed and bathed. But we ultimately decided that we don’ t want children of our own. There is far too much glass in our house.”

“I love the little suckers; they’re so cute but I love sleep so much and I worry about everything.”
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No Kids for Kim Kardashian?

With her mulitmillion dollar wedding and now, after only 72 days, her impending divorce in the news, Kim Kardashian, 31, is rethinking her fairy tale dreams.

She famously stated that she would have four children before she was 35, but her more recent comments on having children is a complete 180:

“At first I was like, I want six kids. Then I went down to four, then I was down to three, and now I’m like, maybe I won’t have any,” she says glumly. “Maybe I’ll just be a good aunt…at this moment in my life, I feel like maybe I’m not supposed to have kids and all that,” Kim says in a December 6 Glamour Magazine article (source Us Magazine)

The self proclaimed hopeless romantic plans to be a little more realistic in the future.

Perhaps, Kim, you should consider the idea of not having kids as genuine option and discover that being child-free can also be a happy ending.

English: Kim Kardashian Fragrance Launch, Glen...

Image via Wikipedia

2 Videos: Childfree Chelsea Handler

For those of you that saw our previous FB post of childfree Chelsea Handler and asked for more, we borrowed this one from Alvaro and our friends on “Happily Childfree“.

Ms. Handler is one of the few female comics (that I know of) with the balls to twist her own taboo baby bashing into thought provoking and funny. Louis C.K.’s “Kids Suck” rants are touching and funny and Aziz Ansari’s take is hilarious too, but the first is a parent and neither would seem to risk the wrath of mommies like a female comic does when she says

“I could have been a mother too okay, three times, but I made the right decisions.”

What do you think? Do you have examples of other women doing this kind of comedy?

Here’s Chelsea Handler’s interview that we posted on Facebook in May:

I’m not sure if the interview occurred before or after the Laugh Factory routine.

1) Video: Aziz Ansari Is Afraid of Babies

2) Kids Suck?: Deadpan and Deadspin Daddies are FUNNY

3) Video: Amy Poehler’s Tip For Traveling With Children

4) Video Vasectomy Shocker: A Survivor’s Tale of Survival

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“Pregnant Women Are Smug”(?)

And “Garfunkel & Oates” are cute. Who knew? They can carry a tune and smile and condescend at the same time. And while their song is topical in a way that kinda fits them on our page, I am already making apologies, starting with my friend Sarah, who is not smug at all lately. Thanks to Rochelle for posting this on Happily Childfree.

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Video: Amy Poehler’s Tip For Traveling With Children

Amy Poehler 2011 Shankbone 3
Image by david_shankbone

CLICK HERE FOR VIDEO of Amy Poehler’s Tip For Traveling With Children.

SNL alum and Parks and Recreation star Amy Poehler has an effective strategy for traveling with babies. DRINK! This one is from a direct post to our “Why no Kids?” Facebook page, where you can find more compelling clips and stories that have not (yet) appeared in the Blog.

Poehler’s P&R co-star Asiz Ansari also chimed in about his own baby strategies earlier this week. And check WNK archives for comedy clips and print from the likes of Louis C.K., Jason Jones and Drew Magary.

 

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Video: Aziz Ansari Is Afraid of Babies

 

Aziz’s Friends: “Aziz! You’re not going to believe it! I just had a baby!”

 

Aziz: “Hahahahaha! That sucks! Oh man, you’re going to have to take care of that thing for18 years and make sure it doesn’t murder anyone! I’ll talk to you later. I’m going to go do literally anything I want.”

And if you want to keep laughing or prefer conversation staring comedy from daddies, have a look at Louis C.k. and Drew Magary on WNK here.

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Video Vasectomy Shocker: A Survivor’s Tale of Survival

Jason Jones conducting an interview for The Da...

Image via Wikipedia

A Survivor’s Tale of Survival – I Survived – The Daily Show with Jon Stewart – 08/04/11 – Video Clip | Comedy Central.

This isn’t just another vasectomy story. Ot is it? Jason Jones is seeking a cure for a “disease” that makes him exhausted, fat and dirty?

Jason Jones narrating: “The doctor held my life in his hands.”

Jason Jones: ”Would you say I have a larger than average vas deferens?”

Surgeon: “You have a great size vas deferens

Jason Jones: “Thank you Dr. Weiner